Congratulations on your engagement! I bet the first things on your mind are booking your venue, your photographer, and finding that perfect dress. I’m also pretty sure that you have turned to internet blogs, books and how-to’s for planning your day. All those lists of things to check off.

As a professional in the wedding industry, I’ve been to A LOT of weddings. So, if I may be so bold, I’d like to offer my two-cents.

Stop. Before you plan a wedding, don’t. Let’s unplan for a moment.

My favourite weddings have always been the rule breakers (and I don’t just mean the people who serve cupcakes instead of a big cake). Why? Because they hold the most weight, the most meaning.

You’re probably asking what an unplanned wedding looks like. So am I. Honestly, I just made the word up, but it works.

Here’s what unplanning looks like:

1. Ask yourself what is the most important thing to you for a wedding. Is it family? Is it food? Your answer should dictate how your day looks.

For example:

– If family is your answer, then maybe you have no bridal party. Maybe you invite only family. Do you get married somewhere where your heritage and roots grow deep? Do your parents perform the ceremony, and your siblings encircle you?

– If food is your answer, do you compromise guest numbers to increase food quality? Have your whole wedding in the leading local restaurant? Have an intimate meal before the ceremony, and a large feast after?

Whatever is your priority, then keep that in the front of your mind as you imagine everything your day could be.

2. Get rid of everything that has no meaning to you, that you don’t love, or that doesn’t fit.

Seriously. You don’t have to do readings if you don’t want to. You don’t have to have a church if you don’t regularly go to one. You don’t have to cut a cake, or even walk down an aisle towards a waiting groom, or have a receiving line, or anything! No wedding favours, or candle ceremonies, or garters. You can make your day whatever you want! If you want those things, great. If you don’t, then do something else.

This is YOUR wedding, remember. So make it about you. Make it about your spouse. Make it about the things you love and the love you have for one another. Trust me, you’ll never regret it.


| • This lovely couple had the most unique wedding. The bride loves knitting, which you see reflected in her bouquet, and  his boutonniere. No bridal party. Our photo session was entirely just the three of us, alone in the woods (loved it!). No processional for this bride who hates the limelight. Instead, the whole crowd walked out together and stood around them. Simplicity. Beautiful. • |

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